I didn't get to science!!

Wow...yesterday didn't go as planned...or so it felt at first.

We started off with our two devotionals about service that really set an excellent tone. I had gone to the temple with my husband and Drew in the morning (date time!), so the kids had been on their own for their morning routine but I have done it enough with them that things were pretty on track when I got home.

We did our mom reading then (everyone but Dad) and finished up "The Lottery Rose."   What a powerful book.  Because of the abuse that is portrayed in the beginning, I recommend a parent read it before deciding to use it.  However, it is such a beautiful look at the healing effects of love, patience, and service even after tragedy and abuse.  You watch this abused, un-loved and hurting "problem child" unfold and blossom, just like the rosebush he cherishes.  I blubbered through the last few chapters but I could feel the kids all there with me, oldest to youngest, as we explored the final healing chapters of this book.  I guess, looking back, even if we did just that and the devotional, it would have been a successful day.  To shape character and mold a virtuous soul is no light thing and to do it together gives us common language and context to refer to later.

I managed to do some 10 minute math with Lek and Avot before the rush of going out the door to swimming, our exercise for the day. (Not as productive, as I tried to do them both at the same time, but they were flexible.) I was feeling pretty tired, but knew that we needed some food before we left, so we hurriedly threw something together.  Swimming was delightful with some other homeschooling families (socialization!) and then Lek and Avot headed out to their madrigal group.  The rest of us bundled up a short while later and headed back, the little ones thankfully zonking off to sleep on the way home.  We grabbed a bit more food, adding to the chaos spread across the counters and table and I held out hope for a nap.

No such luck :).

My older girls are having a combined birthday party for "sisters" their ages this Saturday so I spent the afternoon picking up a chocolate fondue fountain, fondue supplies, and material for a quilt.  My 16 year old son has a date Friday night and they want to watch a movie as part of it.  Our concession? If they are tying a quilt while they watch it :).  My son commented, "Fun idea but stupid reason."  I agreed.  "Hormones are stupid.  I agree."

I took Piper (8) along with me (date time again!), and we had a great time together. I picked up a little something,...okay, a giant donut for that tiny girl to enjoy while we were out, and it was fun.  It is magical what happens when you get some one-on-one time!  The kids never seem to get enough, so I try to do it when I remember. (Realistically, they maybe get once a month each, but it is better than nothing!)

By that point, I was ready to drop. Fortunately, Drew (13) wanted to cook dinner that night for his "dinner help" so I was able to straighten up the chaos of the kitchen while listening to a few scenes of Henry the V.  Cleaning is almost as relaxing as laying down and Drew has just enough and just not enough experience that he still needs a little supervision :).  As it was, we learned how not to burn the alfredo. (I love Edison's motto and try to remember it in those frustrating moments of kitchen disaster: we have learned a lot of ways to not do things!  Sometimes I say it between gritted teeth, but it does offer some perspective to calm my irritation when I let it :)...)

Dinner had to happen at a certain time to allow time for kids to get off for interviews at 6:30 and we just barely made it in.  The other older crowd headed out around 7 pm, just about the time I had settled on my bed to relax for about 20 minutes while the little ones watched "Magic School Bus"...our science for the day :S.  Oh well!  I hadn't been able to find our Wile science book and I was trying not to be too dejected about losing yet another book or item. (My life seems filled with it lately!)

I got up after the Magic School Bus ended, read scriptures with the kids who had come home and the little ones, said prayers and gave sippy cups of milk all around while the older ones went out to finish up their dinner help.

Tova (18) was one of the ones to come home early and so we ate some cookies from Kel's cookie dough from the night before while we discussed and reviewed her week's chapter of "Evolution" from her Apologia "Biology" book.  We had a great discussion and enjoyed the cookies...a little to much.  The last one was just getting eaten when Kel walked through the door.  "Did you just eat the last of my cookies?" he said disbelievingly.

My need to nurture my 16 year old son overcame my exhaustion and I piped in with something I had been considering but hadn't been able to commit myself to yet...

"I was going to make another batch of cookies tonight," I said aloud, even while my tired pregnant body groaned.  His expression of delight more than made up for the inner sigh.  Sacrifice brings forth the blessings of heaven :).

As I finished up the cookie batter and had just put some into the oven, I turned to see the imploring eyes of my Hyrum (10).  "Mom, weren't we going to do a piano lesson today?"  It has been three days in the promising.  Time to fulfill.  Ironically, most of his lessons seem to happen at or after 9 pm at night :S.  Putting on a smile and knowing he could sense any frustration, we had fun addressing short parts of the songs he is working on and he went to bed, love-cup filled.

A quick round of saying prayers with my "middles" was a treat before coming upstairs to enjoy the fruit of my cookie-labors (not a completely selfless enterprise!) with Tova and my honey, who was looking up interesting facts on the computer of the village we might be moving to. (Doesn't "village" have a delicious ring to it!)

It was then that I realized I hadn't arranged for a babysitter for a family history convention most of us are going to on Saturday :S.  Going to my room to get the phone to text a young lady up the street, I saw my bed.  My wonderful bed.  My delightful bed.  It was too much.  Text sent, I let my body sink into paradise and was deeply asleep before 10 pm.

It's funny how one my last thoughts was of frustration..."I didn't do science!"  Silly woman.  Look at what you did do!  How often do we focus on what we didn't do and not on all the wonderful little learning and nurturing opportunities that happened in the day!  Science will come...

Reading with Hava

As I sat here, listening to Hava (6) learn how to read, I realized how much I have changed since I first started homeschooling.  When my oldest were three and four, we started playing with letters.  I pulled out all the little workbooks and tried to come up with incentives to finish them when the novelty wore off.  Fortunately, Tova and Kel were quick learners and that "system" worked for them.

Then came Drew, bless his darling little heart.

That child defied everything.  Anxious that he wouldn't be labeled at church or by relatives, I worked through flashcards, letter games...you name it. I still remember just selecting four very recognizable letters: A, O, S and T.  He must have been at least 5, if not 6 at this point.  "Old enough to know letters," I was sure.  I took the very excited, very enthusiastic tow-head to the couch and explained the different letters, their different shapes and names.  Bobbing his head up and down, he assured me he was ready.  He started bouncing up and down, shouting out random letters whenever I flashed through the cards, "Z!  P!  O!  A!  S!  R!"  It didn't really matter and he only hit a right one every so often.  I finally internally admitted defeat, pasted on a smile for the bouncing, blue-eyed boy eagerly jumping up and down in front of me, and decided the time wasn't right.

And I am so glad I did!

We would pull out the same four flashcards periodically when he would tell me he "wanted to learn to read" or if someone at church or at family gatherings said an unkind comment.  Gradually, we started adding letters, but I remember he was at least 7 and he still wasn't truly reading: recognizing words, putting them together...you name it.  Each time we would do the flashcards, though, it was a game, it was fun, and it was positive.

At 8, something clicked.  He was ready.  He struggled through the first pathway reader, but he was determined and he was ready.  By the second book, the randomly blurted out words coincided more and more with the actual words on the page and hope rose up within me.  By 9, he was reading books like other kids drink koolaid...devouring them whole.  He didn't necessarily understand all of the words, but he understood the books, the messages, the meanings.  I still remember the first time he came to me having finished his first "Childhood of Famous American" series book.

"You finished it already?" I asked skeptically.  His astonished eyes blinked, not completely understanding my implication that he might have skipped parts.  I started quizzing him gently, not trying to show my doubts too obviously.  After close scrutiny, I was satisfied that he had finished it.  His older siblings were similarly skeptical that this non-reader had so quickly transformed to truly the fastest reader in our house.  He still devours books whole.

Every child learns to read best at their own pace and in their own time.

"Leo the Late Bloomer" is a classic story about just such a thing.

 Take Hava.

Her older sister Piper (8) is just feeling like she "knows how to read," and even then is barely reading the beginning of the Pathway Readers series.  However, Hava has been "playing" with the alphabet for years through the occasional Leap Frog videos from the library and our erratic "preschool" classes over the years. Hava, watching her older sister read, wanted to give it a try.  We opened the book last week.  She recognized, comprehended and learned.  She is ready and flying through the book.  Crazy. 

When they first express an interest in reading, I have let my kids read aloud to me off and one out of the first two books of the Pathway series.  At first, I would basically start sounding out the words with them and help them gain confidence and feel simple joy while sitting in front of a book, sounding out words. 

There are two approaches to teaching kids anything in my mind:
#1-you can force them into the ZPD--the zone of proximal discomfort.  This is very common.  The idea behind this is that if a child can do something easily, then you can just push them a little harder to the "next level" to where they feel some discomfort to "help them grow."  In an article I read a long time ago by the DeMilles, they quoted an educational philosopher who spoke of the value of pushing our kids into this zone, this ZPD, when they are older...try post-puberty.  To push a child into this zone at a younger age creates a feeling of frustration associated with the learning process.  They begin to develop negative feelings towards the learning process.  Of course, there is a difference between pushing them into this zone verses challenging them and them arising to the challenge.

#2-(my prefered choice) You do what Pudewa suggests in his presentations: "Teaching Boys & Other Children Who Would Rather Be Building Forts All Day." (This download is completely worth the $3!!)  He suggests you give the child a lot of positive experience in an area, building their confidence in that subject so their approach to it is one of confidence.  "If your child struggles with math, ask him every day, 'What is 10 + 10?' and when he replies every day with '20!' you cheer, 'Wow! You are amazing at math!'"  Not only do they develop a positive association and confidence in that subject, it will make them want to go deeper and push themselves more.  Totally works!

Reading.  It's amazing.  And if they are ready to read at 12 and they are confident about it, how much better to have that than a child that was pushed at 5 and 6 into something that they feel "dumb" at and in the long run reject and don't enjoy it.

Now, just because I don't force it, doesn't mean I just let it go.  We play with letters and sounds from a young age.  I read out loud to my children daily.  I share with them cool quotes out of what I am currently reading or refer to stories I have read.  We go to the library where we select quality books that change lives.  Reading in our house is always the tantalizing reward and my kids cherish books from a young age...even if they don't read "at age level" at first :).

Note on the Pathway Readers series: published by the Amish, full of values and simple repetition with engaging story lines.  None of my children have "finished" the Pathway readers series...so I guess it is a good thing I only bought through grade 3 and then their "Our Heritage" book that my oldest enjoyed.   However, each o