Wednesday, June 1, 2016

Giving Them Room to Fail

My 19 year old who just left on a mission left me a card to read after she left.

"Thanks for stepping back and giving me the opportunity to fail this past year and figure things out."

She has been asking for this kind of space for a few years now, but in my "fear of preparation of the future" I just couldn't do it and kept encouraging, and encouraging, and "encouraging" her.  When does "encouraging" become "driving" or (even worse) "nagging"?

It was an interesting phrase. I know there are different times and different seasons but this comment will be definitely shaping my homeschooling.

1 comment:

  1. In what ways did you do that? It's been a very recent conversation at our house, stepping back. But like in your "which part is mine" post, different kids have different needs. Some I can step back far and easily. Others still need it. Different situations also need different levels of involvement. If others are relying on them to be successful, then I need to help them be successful. If the failure lies solely with them, fine. I've seen others do it completely wrong - canceling a while scout activity because one boy didn't make a call to arrange it, yet the leaders didn't remind and parents probably weren't aware. They call it a lesson, but how embarrassing for the boy. Would he accept that responsibility from them again? Probably not.

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