As I lay upon the couch in my semi-comatose early pregnancy state I gazed across the room at my bookshelf. My 2 year old snuggled against me, I had no desire to get up but soon the pull of all that perspective pulled at me...so I asked my "willing-legged" Piper (13) to retrieve an unlikely pair of books: "Roots of Strategy: Book 2" and "The English Governess at the Siamese Court."
Strange Connections
Lounging in utter comfort I started reading "Roots of Strategy" and was immediately pulled into the narrative of a man who sought to learn the art of war by reviewing what happened in previous engagements rather than just in theory, like so many of his genre.
The smallest detail, taken from an actual incident in war, is more instructive for me, a soldier, than all the Theirs and Jominis in the world. They speak, no doubt for the heads of states and armies but they never show me what I wish to know--a battalion, a company, a squad, in action.
He goes on to ask a series of questions regarding the nature of information he is seeking: from the changing attitudes of the soldiers during advances and retreats (when and to what degree), the reactionary orders of officers, how they were received, reactions to varying degree and types of assault, etc. It was very exhaustive.
I pondered on what that kind of study of parenthood would do: not a book on organized theory but to give someone the actual account of parenting experiences in similar detail for the reader to draw their own conclusions based upon actual experience. I find I enjoy books like this: "More than Happy Children: The Secret of Amish Parenting" and "There's No Such Thing As Bad Weather"...even if I don't agree with all their conclusions or take-home messages. There is something delicious about wandering through the minutes of someone else's life to learn from and draw my own conclusions from.
Perhaps that is part of the draw of using "original sources" so touted by the Thomas Jefferson Education community?
I put down that book and picked up the other while enjoying a few cookies and milk some time later. This book is the basis for "The King and I" and as I read it, I realized it was similar in scope and purpose to the account of duPicq I had just read. Anna Harriette Leonowens sets out with an intent to share with the world her personal experience in the courts of Siam. Her book is part of Andrew Pearson Zuckerman's Southeast Asian Collection:
Through these world, readers can discover many people, places and events described by those who came before us. This historic collection is intended to keep in print all the divergent political and cultural perspectives of this region, enabling those who come after us to see a clear path to a world that includes self-determination, understanding, and sustainability.
Again, my mind wandered back to the power of a detailed account of personal experience. I am reminded of the power of "bloggers" who do just that. I wonder if I were to start doing it in a way that covers the situations of parenting in similar scope and honesty with self that duPicq demands what I and my posterity could learn?
I am intrigued.
Mother vs. Military Leader
DuPicq insists that this approach to military leadership and preparation is paramount to this field alone:
No calling other than the true military profession is so fitted to excite brain activity. It is preeminently the calling of action, at the same time diverse in its combinations and changing according to the time and locality wherein it is put to practice. No other profession is more complex nor more difficult, since it has for its aim and reason the instruction of men to overcome by training and endurance the fatigue and perils against which the voice of self-preservation is raised in fear; in other words, to draw from nature what is most opposed and most antipathetic to this nature.
As I read through this, several arguments came to mind:
-Is not the nature of man to revile and contend against each other? True, war takes this to a degree that is unparalleled in demanding that lives be taken simply upon an order, but is not the role of a mother to shape the spirit and home to create a place where the natural tendencies of selfishness and pride do not hold sway? Is not a mother's desire for a peace-filled and work/learning centered home the very definition of "to draw from nature what is most opposed and most antipathetic to [its] nature"? Ever tried to get kids excited about being responsible, kind and motivate self-learners? A general prepares for a battle. A mother prepares for every day "warfare."
-As to the " diverse combinations" and "changing according to the time and locality wherein it is put to practice" you only have to look at the many household around the world to see the complexity and changeable nature of environments that the profession of motherhood must rise up to perform in, let alone the diversity experienced as a family morphs through different stages.
My purpose is not to negate duPicq's argument. I agree that a military leader does have this range and scope of circumstances to confront and to do it effectively does take much skill and "excited brain activity." My point is that perhaps motherhood--in being perhaps
more in need of the "excited brain activity--could also benefit from learning from accurate, minute detail from those who have experienced it or who are experiencing it.
To Detail or Not To Detail
In the past, I have faced the dilemma: do I want to spend so much time
recording my life that I spend not enough time
living my life. That, too, is a challenge. I also abhor public acknowledgement of anything that sets me above others, as it violates my core belief that all are truly equal in the sight of God. Also, too often public veneration takes away from everyday nature of a person's life that has it's own beauty...partially because it is their everyday.
However, this blog may be the perfect place to do it. It is connected enough to my other blogs that should someone really want to read it, they will be able to find it. Perhaps some of my children will feel this way. I do not seek to make this record as something to hold up as an ideal but rather something to learn from--from the good and the bad--to be read with optimal objectivity and minimal sentimentality.
As I am by nature somewhat sentimental, I have no doubt that emotions will be conveyed. Yet, I hope that they may lend to the authenticity of the experience as no parenting experience should be devoid of emotion.
Let's see if this venture lasts more than today's "piqued" interest ;). (Catch the connection? duPicq? Hahaha.)
I think that I will just sit down and record what I remember of that day after the fashion as if I were answering the motherhood equivalent of Picq's military questions. Sometimes my time will be limited but I will seek accuracy and candidness in my account.
